A lot of times, feelings are invalidated, and invalidating the feelings of a person sends the message that their thoughts and emotions are not important or valid.
This move just makes one feel dismissed and rejected, and this can build up resentment and create an unhealthy relationship dynamic because it is important to acknowledge what the other person is feeling and have an open conversation about the situation.
This applies not just in marriages, but in relationships and most friendships, hence why we have put together 5 ways to respond to make someone feel heard and included.
1. JUST CALM DOWN, THERE IS NO NEED TO GET THIS WORKED UP
STRIKE THAT, TRY SAYING THIS INSTEAD: I can understand you are upset, I think it might be better if we pause and come back to this conversation, it will give us a chance to think things through.
2. I WAS JUST JOKING! DON’T BE SO SENSITIVE
TRY SAYING THIS INSTEAD: I genuinely had not meant to hurt you, but I understand now how it might have, I am sorry.
3. YOU ARE IMAGINING THINGS
TRY SAYING THIS INSTEAD: I don’t see things the same way but I can understand that this is upsetting you, will you listen to my side of the story now?
4. IT DOESN’T MEAN ANYTHING
TRY SAYING THIS INSTEAD: You are saying this keeps happening between us, in this friendship/relationship, can you help me understand how this is a pattern, please?
5. YOU ARE OVERREACTING
TRY SAYING THIS INSTEAD: I can see this was frustrating you, can we talk about it? I’d like to share my perspective too.
See the video below for more!
